Friday, October 23, 2015

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Today's Horoscope (Virgo): It isn't a good idea to encourage others to enter competitions today.

Early Morning

For some reason, Celestia is wearing an unusually short black skirt, a white silk blouse, and black high heels this morning.

"Why, Principal Celestia!" Rarity says. "You look positively smashing today!"

Celestia smiles as she sips her coffee. "Thank you," she says.

"I've never actually seen you wear a skirt before," Twilight says. "You usually wear slacks."

Celestia shrugs. "The incident with the photograph..." Her cheeks turn faintly pink. "While...rather embarrassing...it's had unexpected positive effects." She looks chagrined and somehow flattered at the same time. "It seems having a sexy principal is...trending. Very favorably. So...I've decided to, as I believe the saying goes, own it."

Twilight laughs. "Good for you," she says. "You know...you're not nearly as intimidating as..." She ducks her head. "You're...a lot more approachable than most of us thought you'd be."

Celestia smiles. "The reason I became an educator in the first place was to help my students reach their potential," she says. "It's never been my wish for the students at my school to be intimidated by me." She sips her coffee again. "If it takes showing a little leg to gain their trust, well..."

"That's not a little leg, that's a LOT of leg!" Pinkie says. Everyone laughs.

"Somethin' tells me it ain't their trust you'll be gettin' like that," Applejack says.

Celestia shrugs. "Oh, I'm sure there'll be some boys jerking off in the bathroom thinking about me," she says. "At my age, if teenage boys are having those kinds of thoughts about me, well..." She smiles.

"Gross!" Twilight says, making a face.

Rarity clears her throat. "So, will Vice-Principal Luna be taking the same...ahem...softer approach?" she asks, cheeks red.

Celestia laughs. "Hardly! It's her job to scare the living hell out of you all." She daintily wipes her mouth with a napkin. "Changing the subject...the Fall Formal is in three weeks. I know Flash and Twilight already have dates, but...the rest of you shouldn't wait too long."

"Goodness, is it time for the Fall Formal already?" Rarity asks. "Why, wherever does the time go? I must begin planning my ensemble this weekend!" She looks around the table. "And...perhaps I should take time to select appropriate outfits for the rest of you as well."

"So, will any of you be running for Princess of the Fall Formal?" Celestia asks.

"Twilight should totally run!" Pinkie says.

"I believe I may as well toss my chapeau into the ring," Rarity says.

"Oh, well...if Rarity's running, I wouldn't want to—"

"Oh, nonsense, darling! I welcome the friendly competition."

"Do it, Twilight," I say. "You know you've got my vote."

Twilight smiles. "A-alright," she says. "I think I will."

"You know you'll both be running against Sunset Shimmer, right?" Fluttershy asks quietly.

Rarity waves a hand dismissively. "Puh-lease, darling. With Twilight's good-natured natural charm and the advantage of an attractive boyfriend, and my elegance, grace, and beauty...there's simply no competition! Ahem. Except between the two of us, of course."

Celestia stands. "Well, I'd best be off," she says. "See you all at school!"

Once she's out the door, Rainbow Dash says, "You know...legs like that almost make me wish I was gay."

"She's our principal!" Twilight cries.

Rainbow shrugs. "So? Still totally hot. I could totally see gettin' under her desk, eatin' her out instead of sittin' in class. Uhh...I'm still not gay though."

Every girl at the table scoots away from Rainbow Dash.

School is going to be interesting today...

After School

Halfway through tennis practice, I twist my wrist hard. Even though Coco is no longer the team manager, she drops what she's doing and heads over to the bench to help me.

"Pommel! You should let what's-her-name take care of Sentry!"

"She doesn't know how to deal with this kind of injury," Coco says. "I do. And if you let me take care of it, he won't have to sit out tomorrow's match."

The coach nods. "Alright, fine."

Coco looks at my wrist. "I did this to myself once when I was twelve," she says. "It hurts, but if you rest it, you'll be good to play tomorrow, so long as you tape it up before you play." She blushes. "Umm...if you like, I can tape it up for you before the matches tomorrow. Since they're here in Canterlot this time."

"Thanks," I say. "I appreciate it." I watch her work. "Wow. You really do know what you're doing."

"I learned from my dad," she says. "He's a professional player."

"Is that why you're so good?"

Coco nods. "I don't...really like to brag, but...I've learned a lot from him, even though I've never actually played all that much."

"You could probably go pro too," I say.

"Oh...n-no, I don't really want..." Coco blushes. "I don't think I could handle the attention. It's...it's a really stressful life, you know? I...I think I'd rather do something more...low-key. Like...maybe be a tennis instructor, or...or work in a sporting goods store, or write reviews of equipment. Something...where I'm not really out there in front of people."

Coco finishes taping up my wrist. I pack up my gear and head home to rest up. I won't be playing my guitar today...

Evening

Twilight is worried about me when she sees my wrist taped up, but I assure her I'll be fine.

At dinner, Celestia says, "I want you all to know I've enjoyed getting to know each of you better this week. Having spoken to each of you at length, I fully believe that every person in this dorm is a victim, not a culprit, and none of you are under suspicion for any reason."

We let out a collective sigh of relief.

"However, my sister and I will still be alternating weeks living here at this dorm," she says. "We're still determined to understand exactly why so many awful things have happened to, or been blamed on, this particular group of students. There's also the matter of the ongoing case of the webcam hacks. There's still much for us to learn, and so few true leads. So, I hope you'll be patient."

"Of course we will," Twilight says.

"We'll do whatever we can to help," Rarity promises.

"Splendid," Celestia says. She looks at me. "You'll be representing Canterlot in tomorrow's tennis matches, right?"

I nod.

"I wish you the best of luck." Celestia stands. "I have some work to attend to before I turn in. I'll be leaving early in the morning. My sister will take my place here at the dorm on Monday evening."

We're all nervous about that. Celestia has proven to be a warm, sociable, and friendly woman, but every student at CHS fears Luna.

I watch television in the lounge with some of the girls for a little while, then head upstairs to send my parents an e-mail before bed.

There's a knock on my door, and Celestia enters. She's changed into a set of peach silk pajamas decorated with suns.

"We've run into a wall in the investigation," she says with a sigh. "Our hacker is covering their tracks extremely well."

I frown. "That...sucks."

"I'm telling you this because I feel at least one student in the dorm deserves to know, and, well...you are the one who's been blamed for a crime you didn't commit." Celestia picks at a thread on her pajama top. "My sister is beginning to subscribe to your theory that Sunset Shimmer is the mastermind behind everything."

"Maybe because she's an evil witch that loves tormenting everyone and has her little freshman flunkies take embarrassing pictures and videos of people she doesn't like?"

"All circumstantial," Celestia says. "The only thing that even comes close to substantial evidence is that Sunset Shimmer has second-tier administrative access to Canterbook, but that's only because she manages the horoscope app. She doesn't have access to accounts or—"

"Wait," I say. "Say that again?"

Celestia blinks. "Sunset Shimmer manages the horoscope app." She shrugs. "Canterbook has a lot of nonessential apps...horoscopes, games, the public notice boards...most of them are run by student volunteers. Sunset Shimmer has a love of astrology, so she runs the horoscope app."

I feel a chill run up my spine.

"In any case, as I said...her access doesn't give her enough priveleges to mess with accounts, and the secure workstation she uses in the faculty room has been thoroughly investigated. It hasn't been used for anything illegal."

I frown. "But...doesn't she need to update the horoscope app on weekends and holidays?"

Celestia shakes her head. "She inputs a week's worth of horoscope data into the system at a time. She's usually only in the faculty office once or twice a week, and never unsupervised. She doesn't have outside access to the system." She shrugs. "I'm sorry, Flash, but...I just don't see any way she could be the culprit."

You're wrong, Celestia. Sunset Shimmer is absolutely the culprit...

...but only two people know enough about what's really going on to believe me.

Celestia stands and stretches. "Whoever it is, we'll find out eventually. They can't avoid being caught forever. Goodnight, Flash. Good luck tomorrow."

As soon as she leaves, I pull out my phone and call Twilight, then Cadance, to tell them what I just learned.

I have a hard time getting to sleep...