Wednesday, June 22, 2016
Wednesday, June 22, 2016
Today's Horoscope (Virgo): Don't forget to bring chocolate and graham crackers with you.
Early Morning
The sky is just barely starting to turn pink when we're all roused from our tents by Applejack. She wants us to do all the animal-related chores while Granny makes breakfast.
"Coach an' Big Mac went out t' th' smokehouse t' bring in some bacon an' ham," she says. "Pinkie, Granny needs yer help in th' kitchen. Apple Bloom, Scootaloo, y'all feed th' chickens. Silver Spoon, Sweetie Belle, y'all round up th' eggs. Rainbow, you an' me'll clean up th' chicken shit."
"AGAIN?"
"If'n y'wanna eat. Sunset, you muck out th' stables while Fluttershy an' Rarity feed an' water th' horses." She frowns, then looks at Fluttershy. "If'n that one pulls any funny business, do your ninja thing on her."
Fluttershy gives Sunset a hard look. "Yeah, I can do that."
"Everybody else, feed th' pigs an' water anything that needs water." She claps her hands once. "Let's move!"
As we're scattering, I hear Scootaloo ask, "what 'ninja thing'?" Apple Bloom gives her a shaky laugh in reply.
Shortly after I leave the camp, my phone vibrates in my pocket. I check it and find a message from Zecora.
It would not do to raise your hosts' ire, so we will commence when you all retire.
I...guess that means our battles will happen after we all go to bed from now on? Or at least while we're at Sweet Apple Acres...
"So we don't have to deal with the next fight until after we're all asleep and tired after a hard day's work," Twilight says when I show her the text. "I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing."
"Probably a good thing," I say. "I hope. Anyway, let's get this done so we can clean up."
Sonata starts filling the pigs' water trough while Twilight and I grab a couple of buckets of half-rotten apples and some stale old gristle and cornbread crumbs. We walk over to the pig sty, where most of the pigs are still asleep, grunting softly. A few are up and rooting around. I let out a few sharp whistles, then toss the contents of my bucket into the feed trough. More of the pigs wake up; slowly, several sows shuffle over to the trough and start nosing around in it, lapping up apples and crud.
By the time we're done, the sun is slowly cresting the horizon, and the roosters are making a ferocious racket. We stop by to toss some feed to the roosters on our way back to the house, where we clean ourselves up outside before heading in to wash up and change clothes. Tantalizing smells are wafting out of the kitchen.
The Apples have two bathrooms, which is fortunate; even with everybody rushing through their morning ablutions, it still takes over an hour for us all to get cleaned up and ready for the day. Granny serves us all breakfast as we finish and sit down, so at any given time, someone has already finished eating while someone else is just sitting down. Nobody's getting slighted on portions, though, because Granny and Pinkie made enough for everyone to have three helpings and then some. Big Mac and Shining Armor pass around some really strong coffee, and by the time the sun is all the way up, half of us are wired up to get to work, while the rest are finishing breakfast at a more sedate pace.
"Can y'all fellers git goin' on paintin' th' barn today?" Big Mac asks. "Ah gotta slaughter a hog."
"Sure, we can do that," Shining Armor says.
Fluttershy looks upset. "You...you're going to kill one of those sweet piggies?"
Big Mac shoots her a sidelong glance. "Didja like that bacon you was eatin' jes' now?"
"Well...yes."
Big Mac snorts. "Where'n th' hell'd you reckon it came from?"
Fluttershy shudders. "Right..." She shakes her head. "I guess I just didn't think of that."
"Circle of life, Fluttershy," Sunset says. "Everything eats something else."
"So what's gonna eat you?" Rainbow asks, raising an eyebrow.
Sunset smirks. "That depends."
Daytime
The day passes in a haze of sweaty, back-breaking labor, broken only by occasional water breaks and one of Granny Smith's mouthwatering lunch spreads. Halfway through the morning, I can tell Silver Spoon is questioning her decision to come here. I don't think she's sweated this much in her entire life.
Sunset Shimmer is surprisingly adept at farm work. From where Coach and I are working, we can see her pitching hay with Rainbow Dash and Sonata. Half the girls are out in the orchard working; Applejack and Rarity are in the cellar, sorting and storing apples. As for Fluttershy, she's spending most of the day doing things with the animals. Pinkie, of course, is in the house with Granny.
By suppertime, we're all grimy and exhausted...
Evening
We have supper in the living room, with the TV on and tuned to some comedy show.
"Y'all sure got a lot done today!" Granny says.
"Eeyup," Big Mac agrees. "If'n y'all git as much done every day you're here as you did today, Ah might actually git ahead of th' work around here."
"That's the plan," Twilight says.
We all mutually agree that we've earned a break this evening, so after dinner, we sit around watching TV and playing cards until bedtime. At nine, we head out to the camp and crawl into our tents, aching all over and tired to the bone. It takes almost no time at all to fall asleep.
The Velvet Room...
We're all here, including Cadance. She smiles as she sees us. "Enjoying the farm?"
"It's more exhausting this time because it's hot out," Twilight says. "How are things back at the dorm?"
"Quiet."
Zecora steps into view. Without a word, she gestures to her right. A door rises out of the ground. Inside its gold frame...
...is not the Devil Arcana.
Rainbow's brow furrows. "Huh? Wasn't the last one number—" She pauses to count on her fingers. "Sixteen? This one's number fourteen. What gives?"
"Miss Zecora?" Twilight asks, staring curiously at the door to the Temperance Arcana. "Shouldn't the Devil Arcana be next?"
Zecora has a grave expression on her face. "The sun may rise, and the rooster may crow, but the Devil casts no Shadow."
I don't know why, but I suddenly feel a chill running down my spine.
"Umm...is anybody else really creeped out right now?" Pinkie asks in a small voice.
"Let's...let's worry about that later," Twilight says, casting Zecora a nervous glance. "Actually, let's just be glad we don't have to deal with that person's Shadow." Her brow furrows, and she looks at me. "So this one's Temperance..."
I nod and, with a quick glance at Rarity, walk over to the door. As I touch it, it dissolves in shimmering, sparkly light, a host of glowing musical notes bubbling up into the air with a melodic tone. I step back, and Sweetie Belle walks through the open door.
Rarity gasps. "S-Sweetie Belle?!"
Sweetie Belle's head is bowed.
All my life, I've had to put up with Rarity constantly looking down on me, trying to make me be like her. The music I like isn't good enough! The clothes I wear aren't good enough! My hair isn't good enough! My friends aren't good enough!
Rarity covers her mouth with her hands.
Sweetie Belle looks up with gold-on-black eyes.
And when I finally stood up for myself, when I made a friend who Rarity didn't like...a friend I wanted to protect from everyone who hated him and teased him and called him names...
She clenches her fists and trembles.
It turns out Rarity was right all along.
She throws back her head and screams.
I HATE YOU, RARITY! I HATE HOW YOU'RE ALWAYS SO PERFECT AND RIGHT ALL THE TIME AND I'M ALWAYS MESSING EVERYTHING UP!
"S-sweetie Belle..."
Sweetie sinks to her knees.
I hate how the one thing I wanted to protect is gone...Button might as well be dead...
"Poor kid," Rainbow says.
I am the Shadow, the True Self! I'm sick and tired of nothing ever going right for me! I'm sick of my annoyingly perfect sister! I WANT MY HAPPY ENDING, EVEN IF I HAVE TO GO RIGHT THROUGH YOU TO GET IT!
Sweetie Belle's Shadow takes on a starchy, puffy appearance, then starts to stretch out to the sides. She tears herself into four gooey, misshapen lumps, which fold and roll themselves into marshmallow-like shapes. Heads, arms, and legs sprout out of them, and they begin taking on new features. Each one has a cartoony caricature of Sweetie Belle's face, with comically huge eyes. One is wearing elaborate, puffy armor and holding a sword and shield made of marshmallows. The second is wearing a flowing white robe and holding a staff, also made of marshmallows. The third is wearing a black hooded cape (made of marshmallows) and has a big magic wand (made of marshmallows), and all we can see of her shadowed face is her glowing green eyes. The last one is dressed in a dark green outfit with a black domino mask and has a longbow (made of marshmallows). They all spread out in a line in front of us and start marching in place.
"Uhh..." Applejack stares at the squashy little Shadows, scratching her head. "Whut?"
The ground rumbles. //Guys, behind you!//
We turn around in time to see a huge, blocky marshmallow castle rise up out of the ground. In the tallest tower, a tiny, brown-skinned, faceless marshmallow princess in a poofy marshmallow dress and a tall, conical marshmallow hat is waving a scarf over her head, her long red marshmallow hair flouncing around her marshmallow shoulders.
"Oh my god," Pinkie says slowly, eyes wide. "Is...is that supposed to be—"
"Button Mash," I say, facepalming.
"Oh, this is so, so wrong," Sonata says, shaking her head and giggling.
"Well," Rainbow says, blinking at the castle, the princess, and the Shadows. "That happened."
Rarity's eye twitches. "Ahem. Would someone mind telling me exactly what we're even looking at here?"
"Looks like a standard adventure party from Mallowcraft," Sonata says. "There's a knight, a cleric, a wizard, and a thief."
"A thief with a bow?" Pinkie asks. "Wouldn't that be a ranger? Or an archer?"
//I'm scanning, but I get the feeling Sonata's right. Also, ignore the weird Princess Button thing. It's not real.//
"Look, this is just another battle," Fluttershy says, already gearing up and readying her weapon. "Whatever these stupid things look like, they're just Shadows. Let's do this and get out of here so we can rest up for tomorrow's chores."
"Of...of course," Rarity says, taking a deep breath. "Even if...even if..."
"We'll talk about that later," I assure Rarity. "For now, are you up to this?"
Pierce Attack
An arrow grazes Rarity's cheek. Her eyes tighten. "Yes. I do believe I am. PERSONA!"
Mabufudyne
Bastet apppears, raining waves of razor-sharp ice shards on the Shadows. The Knight and the Cleric weather the attack. The Mage absorbs the ice into her cloak; her eyes glow more brightly. The Thief, however, screams and falls to the ground.
//The Mage absorbs ice, but the Thief is weak to it!//
Masukunda
Bastet sends dozens of strands of yarn out, which wrap around the Shadows and slow them down.
//Good work! Their evasion is down!//
Marakukaja
The Cleric bows her head and utters a prayer. A golden light envelops the Shadows.
//Be careful! Their defense just went up!//
Tetrakarn
The Knight holds her shield above her head. It pulses, and a reflective barrier expands to cover the four Shadows.
Mind Charge
The Mage raises her staff above her head, and a green magic circle spreads out beneath her feet.
//That one's getting ready to cut loose with some powerful magic!//
"We'll see about that," Fluttershy says. "PERSONA!"
Makarakarn
A shimmering wall of golden light spreads out in front of us.
"My turn!" Sonata says. "LEVIATHAN!"
Tidal Wave
Leviathan rises up; a tidal wave crashes over the Shadows. The Cleric and Thief suddenly turn red.
//The enemy is enraged!//
"Then let's REALLY give 'em somethin' t' be pissed about!" Applejack says. "PERSONA!"
Heat Wave
Persephone appears; the ground begins to shake.
"Applejack, wait! Don't—"
It's too late. Chunks of earth erupt from the floor as a shockwave travels toward the Shadows...
...and stops cold against the reflective wall, rebounding on Applejack, who is thrown against the wall of the marshmallow castle. She slumps against it, not moving.
"Applejack!"
"Cadance, is she—"
//She's alive, just stunned! But at least she took down their barrier!//
"Good! NIKE!"
Sonic Rainboom
Nike bursts into the air and swoops down, jamming on her guitar. A rainbow shockwave rips through the Shadows. The Mage and the Cleric both fall down. "AGAIN!"
Matarukaja
This time, a golden light washes over all of us, filling us with strength.
"I'll take care of Applejack! SERENITY!"
Salvation
Serenity floats over to Applejack and sheds soft silver light over her. Applejack stands up woozily, holding onto her hat. "Well Ah feel like an idjit," she mutters as she trots back over to us.
"It's okay, Applejack," Twilight says. "We all make mistakes." She taps her phone. "ATHENA LOGIA!"
Maziodyne
Athena conjures a lightning storm which strikes the Shadows. The thief, still on the ground from earlier, twitches helplessly. The mage absorbs the lightning.
//Careful, the Mage absorbs electricity!//
"What doesn't the little bitch absorb?" Rainbow mutters.
"I bet she doesn't absorb MY BUTT!" Pinkie yells. "EUPHORIA!"
Orgy of Death
Euphoria spins among the Shadows, slamming them with kicks, punches, slaps, and hip strikes. The Cleric and Mage squirm and squish under her feet, but the Knight remains stalwart.
Pierce Attack
The Thief jumps to her feet, a boiling mad expression on her squishy marshmallow face. She fires two arrows at Rarity. Only one hits, but it's enough to drive Rarity to her knees in pain.
Deathbound
The Knight leaps into our midst, swinging her sword in a wide arc. I can feel a pressure wave cutting through me. Rainbow, Fluttershy, Sonata, and Pinkie avoid being cut, but the rest of us take the hit.
Maragidyne
The Mage rises off the ground, her eyes glowing. She raises her wand above her head. A wall of scorching flames engulfs our party, which is repelled by Fluttershy's barrier. The flames rebound on the Mage, who absorbs them.
//She absorbs Fire too! She's completely back to full health!//
"Okay, that's just not fair!" Rainbow snarls.
Strike Attack
The Cleric stands. She rushes forward, swinging her staff at Rarity. Rarity dodges the first swing, but is clipped on the shoulder by the second. She screams and collapses.
//Be careful! Rarity can't take any more damage!//
"I...can take care of myself...thank you," Rarity grunts as she stands. "PERSONA!"
Diarahan
Bastet appears and heals Rarity. She stands, rubbing her shoulder. "Fluttershy, dear, perhaps you could raise another barrier?"
Fluttershy nods. "Alright, but I don't think I should put up a barrier against magic. Not if that one keeps absorbing it. We'll just have to kill her as fast as we can."
//Fluttershy's right. You need to take out the mage so she can't cast any big spells!//
"I'll keep the others from hitting us! ECHO!"
Tetrakarn
Echo appears and erects a reflective barrier around us.
"So, we need to take out the little magic marshmallow, right?" Rainbow grunts. "I can do that! PERSONA!"
Vorpal Blade
Nike appears and dives down upon the Shadows, her guitar transforming into a blazing sword. She blurs with a burst of speed, striking all four Shadows. The Cleric and Mage fall to the ground again, but the Thief swiftly dodges.
"YEAH! How you like me now?" Rainbow taunts. "Now to turn things up a notch!"
Heat Riser
Nike returns to Rainbow and flies around her in a tight spiral. Rainbow glows several colors, shimmering waves of heat rippling off her body as her hair stirs in a nonexistent wind.
"Pinkie, can you do that thing again?" Twilight asks.
"Huh? Oh! That!" Pinkie nods, summoning her blue gem.
Laughter fills the Velvet Room. A cool blue light surrounds us, even as waves of debilitating force press down on the Shadows.
"Got any new tricks?" Fluttershy asks me. "Because you always seem to have something new every time we do this."
"Actually...I do have one I haven't used yet," I answer, sliding Temperance onto my phone. "It seems only fitting I use it now.
"TRAVELLER!"
A giant marshmallow man rises up, wearing a sailor hat and a goofy expression.
We all stare up at it.
"What."
Fluttershy facepalms. "Seriously?"
Twilight groans. "Flash, there's something seriously wrong with you."
Pinkie giggles. "I kinda like it!"
"Look, I don't know why these things look the way they do, okay?"
//Guys? Shadows?//
"Right, sorry."
God's Hand
The Traveller roars and stomps the downed Shadow Mage.
Power Charge
He then lets out a mighty bellow, and a spinning golden circle of fire forms beneath my feet, rising up my body. It might be my imagination, but I feel like my hair just got spikier...
"Here I go again! PERSONA!"
Spirit Drain
Leviathan appears, surging forward...and halts. The tiny mermaid swims through the air, diving down and disappearing into the Mage. After a moment, she swims back out, trailing a stream of green sparkles as she fades away. Leviathan disappears with her.
Everyone blinks. "Uhh, what...was that?" Rainbow asks.
Sonata giggles. "I just stole some magic." She blinks, opening her eyes wide, looking comically innocent. "Isn't stopping that thing from casting spells the whole point?"
"Well, she ain't wrong," Applejack says. "PERSONA!"
Gigantic Fist
Persephone appears, driving a fist into the Mage.
//One more hit should do it!// Cadance reports.
"I'll handle this!" Twilight says, charging forward and skewering the Shadow Mage with her sword.
Slash Attack
The Mage lets out a high-pitched, squeaky scream and turns into a marshmallow tombstone.
Hamaon
The Knight raises her sword above her head; a bright beam of light shines down upon it. She spins around gracefully, then points her sword at Twilight. It gives off a high-pitched, ringing chime as it fires the beam of light at her. She crosses her arms over her face and braces herself; the light washes over her, lingering for a long moment, before fading away. She lets out a shuddering sigh. "That was close."
"You okay?" I ask.
"Yeah."
The angry red haze surrounding the Cleric fades. She raises her staff and chants a prayer. A spinning orb of blue-white light descends upon the dead Mage.
Samarecarm
The tombstone flashes brightly, and the Mage reappears.
"OH COME ON!" Rainbow yells.
//I don't believe it!//
"Of COURSE," Sonata says in an aggravated tone. "I've fought this kind of boss battle before. Guys, we need to focus on the one that heals and revives the others!"
"Makes sense to me," Pinkie says.
Pierce Attack
The Thief fires two arrows at me, both of which hit. Curiously, I actually feel my fatigue start to ebb as the Shadow arrows are sucked into my body.
"Okay, let's put this bitch down hard and fast," I say.
"HEY!" Rarity yells. "This IS still my precious sister! Err, in a sense."
"Sorry. PERSONA!"
God's Hand
The Traveller appears again, giving a mighty bellow as he stomps on the Cleric. She screams as she's mashed into paste; a marshmallow tombstone springs up from her remains once the Traveller fades.
"Now to take care of that obnoxious Thief," I mutter, swiping the Tower onto my phone. "GOJIRA!"
Spiral Death Ray
Gojira stomps into the fray, clouds of billowing steam rising off his body. His spines glow a furious red; he opens his mouth, issuing steam and smoke as a bright red-white glow fills his jaws. A furious lance of bright red-orange fire erupts from his mouth, red sparks dancing along its length.
"Whoa," Rainbow says. "That's...new."
The scorching fire blast subsides. The Mage is, of course, undamaged. The Knight is smoking and crispy around the edges. The Thief is charred black and flaming. Her eyes blink comically...and she crumbles to ash, a tombstone rising in her place.
//Excellent work! You've taken out two!//
"I'm not done YET!"
God's Hand
Gojira stomps the Mage, squishing her flat.
Gojira's Roar
He then rears back and unleashes an earsplitting, earthshaking roar before fading away.
"EUPHORIA!"
Slam Dance
Euphoria appears, pulling a hip-drop on the downed Mage.
//Just a little more!//
The Knight suddenly stabs her sword into the ground and begins to pray.
Recarm
A weak light surrounds the tombstone that marks where the Cleric fell. With a bright flash and an angelic chime, the Cleric reappears.
"What the fuck?" Rainbow gasps, jaw hanging open.
"Umm..." Twilight turns to Cadance with an uncertain expression.
"Oh, you have GOT to be KIDDING ME!" Pinkie shrieks.
"SCREW THIS!" Applejack roars. "PERSEPHONE!"
Heat Wave
A shockwave of destruction knocks the resurrected Cleric off her feet. The Knight barely staggers.
The Mage stands up shakily and raises her wand.
Maragidyne
Scorching waves of fire wash over us. Applejack and Rarity cry out as they collapse to the ground.
Mabufudyne
The Mage's wand pulses again, and a bitter cold hailstorm buffets us. This time, Twilight crumples with a strangled cry.
Maziodyne
With one final pulse of her wand, a raging thunderstorm rains lightning bolts on us.
We're all in pretty ragged shape after that barrage of magic...
"Persona," Fluttershy says weakly.
Mediarama
Healing light surrounds us all. I'm still aching all over, but I can fight. Applejack, Rarity, and Twilight are still down, but at least they're breathing.
"Okay, this isn't fun anymore," Sonata says. "PERSONA!"
Mamudoon
Leviathan appears, a ball of darkness gathering in its maw. A lance of black energy, writhing with dark sparks, slashes across the remaining Shadows. A wall of darkness explodes up from the ground.
The Knight crumples to the ground, reshaping into a tombstone. The Cleric is completely unaffected. The Mage, however...
Sonata screams as the dark wave bounces off the Mage and rebounds on her. She crumples to the ground, dead.
"SONATA!" Pinkie cries.
Twilight stands up, rubbing her head. "Oh no," she says, looking at Sonata. She glares at the remaining Shadows. "This HAS to end!"
Slash Attack
She staggers forward, stabbing the Cleric through the heart with her sword. As the Cleric falls, she turns and lunges at the Mage, catching her across the face with an upward swing.
Mediarahan
Finally, she summons her Persona, whose powerful healing magic restores everyone except Sonata to full health.
Rarity stands up. "BASTET!"
Samarecarm
Strands of yarn wrap around Sonata, gently lifting her to her feet. With a pulse of soft light, Sonata is brought back to life, blinking her eyes open dizzily.
"Did we win?"
"We're getting there," I say.
//This is your chance!// Cadance says.
"Right!" We all ready our weapons and charge in. In seconds, the Cleric is a marshmallow memory.
"Time to finish this!" Rainbow crows. "PERSONA!"
Vorpal Blade
Nike appears one more time, diving down and slashing the Mage. With one last, pitiful squeak, the Mage turns into a tombstone.
"Well, that wasn't so bad, was it?" Twilight asks brightly.
And then a bomb explodes in the middle of our party, knocking us all to the ground.
"What the hell was THAT?" Rainbow demands as she stands up. We all pick ourselves up, turning around...
The marshmallow castle has just transformed into a giant, snarling Sweetie Belle head with a cannon in her mouth.
"OH COME ON!" Rainbow yells. "We WON this fight already!"
"I thought you said the castle wasn't real!" Twilight cries.
//I don't know what happened! It just...it just suddenly started existing, and...LOOK OUT!//
Another shell fires from the cannon. Fluttershy barely raises a barrier in time, bouncing it back; it hits Sweetie Head in the eye, exploding. A huge, misshapen, burning marshmallow hole mars the Shadow's face where her eye once was.
I! REFUSE! TO! GIVE! UP!
"Sweetie Belle...please...stop this," Rarity says gently. "Look, I..."
JUST SHUT UP! I DON'T WANT YOU FOR A SISTER! I'M BETTER OFF WITHOUT A SISTER!
Rarity flinches. "Now, Sweetie Belle," she tries again.
//Hold on a second! Guys, that...weird marshmallow head thing...it's just a shell! The real Shadow is hiding inside it, and she's weak!//
"Then let's bring her out of her shell," I say, sliding Temperance onto my phone. "PERSONA!"
The Traveller appears again, stomping forward. The Sweetie Head shells him, but he stalks toward it, undaunted. With a bellow of rage, he digs his chubby marshmallow fingers into the squishy flesh of the "castle" and tears it apart, flinging huge globs of marshmallow goo all over the place. He seizes a tiny, squirming figure and hauls her out, then throws her at us before fading away.
Sweetie Belle's Shadow pushes herself to her knees, head bowed.
I hate you.
"Now, Sweetie Belle, that's enough," Rarity says. She steps forward. "Look, I..." She sighs. "I'm not perfect. Far from it. And...I'm sorry if I ever made you feel..." She crouches down, tilting Sweetie Belle's chin up. "I really do only want what's best for you, don't you understand? Because you're my sister, and I love you. It's just...sometimes, I don't stop to think that maybe the things I like aren't necessarily what's right for you. And...and I should have been more supportive of you when you brought Button Mash around. Even though that whole thing turned out so horribly...I was never very fair to him or to you." Her eyes well with tears. "I only want...I only want you to be happy. And healthy. And safe. And fashionable. Is that...is that really so terrible?"
Sweetie Belle looks away.
I...
I step forward. "You're lucky to have a sister who cares so much about you," I say. "You should appreciate her, even when she's being a bossy nag."
Rarity looks up at me, eyes narrowed. "A nag," she says flatly.
I poke her in the forehead and neigh like a horse.
Sweetie Belle giggles. She slowly fades away, replaced by the Temperance Arcana card.
The ultimate power of the Temperance awakens unto Thee...
Thy Persona, The Traveller, has awakened to the skill Destructor.
Use this power wisely...
Zecora reappears. "You have three days to catch your breath. On Saturday, you will face Death."
The Velvet Room fades away...
