Persona EG LTE | Mythril Moth Creations

Today's Horoscope (Virgo): No matter what you do today, you're going to end up embarrassing yourself.

Morning

Night Light left early this morning to play golf.

At breakfast, Twilight Velvet gives me, Twilight, Cadance, and Shining Armor a reproachful look. "You know, kids...this house is not a love hotel."

Cadance looks sheepish. "I'm sorry, Vel...it's just...me and Shiny are kind of...treating this week as kind of a second honeymoon..."

"With all we've been through lately..." Shining Armor says with a sickly grimace.

Velvet sighs. "I understand. I'm not mad. Just..." She shakes her head. "And it's not just you two, it's them too," she says, pointing at me and Twilight.

Twilight chokes on her orange juice. "Wh-what?!"

"Oh, don't think I don't know," Velvet says. I feel a chill running up my spine. "You can't pull one over on me, young lady." She smirks at us, hands on her hips.

Cadance and Shining Armor stare at us. Cadance has a smug, catlike smile. Shining Armor's mouth is working like a stranded fish.

"You two are using protection, aren't you?" Velvet asks sternly.

"We...we didn't—" Twilight stammers.

I cough. "Mrs. Velvet? Twilight and I didn't...I mean...your daughter is still a virgin."

Velvet frowns. "I know what I smelled, Flash."

"That was just..." Twilight says. "We...just..."

Shining Armor's face is green, and twisting into an alarming look. Cadance looks like she's fighting not to laugh. I clear my throat. "All we did was touch each other. A lot. Very, very sexy touching."

"I'm out!" Shining Armor says, jumping up and leaving the room. "Don't need to hear this..."

Cadance giggles. Twilight's face is red.

Velvet raises an eyebrow.

"Mom? Please...please don't be mad at Flash, or..."

"I'm not mad at anyone," Velvet says, rolling her eyes. "I just really don't need to know the particulars of my children's sex lives. Not the sounds, not the smells."

"Sorry," Twilight says, burying her face in her hands.

"Yeah, me too," I say. "I...I'm sorry..."

Velvet shakes her head. "As long as you're being careful," she says. "I know what it's like to be your age..."

"Wow, you're awfully chill about this," Cadance says. "I mean, I've been expecting Flash and Twiley to go at it like bunnies for a long time now, but..."

"I was Twiley's age when I..." Velvet blushes faintly. "Well, let's just say there's nothing new under the sun here." She smirks. "You're lucky I'm not like my mother," she adds. "The first time I came home with a hickey, she took a switch to me."

Cadance blinks. "She whipped you for getting a hickey?"

"The hickey was on my thigh," Velvet says.

"And now I'm out," I say.

Twilight laughs and grabs my arm, pulling me back down into my seat. "Oh no," she says. "If I have to sit through this, so do you."

Velvet snickers. "Well, I know I've got laundry to do," she says. "Flash, I'm sure you have something that needs washing..."

"I'll do my own," I say. "I'm not gonna ask you to handle my dirty laundry."

"That's very gentlemanly of you, dear," Velvet says. "Twilight, you'll show him where everything is when he's ready to wash, won't you?"

"Yeah, Mom."

As soon as Velvet leaves to start on the laundry, Cadance smirks at us. "I want details," she says. "Tell me everything."

"Cadance!" Twilight yelps.

"Oh, come on!" Cadance says. "You wouldn't tell me what the hell 'naked cuddling' is, you at least owe me this!"

"OWE you?!" Twilight shouts. "It's your fault anything even happened!"

Cadance blinks. "How's it my fault that you two got into heavy petting?"

"You and Shiny and your...your...noise!" Twilight blushes.

Cadance raises an eyebrow and leers at us. "Oho! So hearing me and Shiny making love got you kids all hot and bothered, huh?"

Twilight wads up a napkin and throws it at her.

Cadance giggles and stands up. "Fine, don't tell me anything juicy," she says with a mock pout. "I'll just go look through your laundry to see how juicy things really got." Sticking her tongue out at us, she heads off in the direction Shining Armor went earlier.

"GAH!" Twilight cries, tugging on her hair in frustration.

"Is it a pink thing?" I wonder. "Are all pink girls that obsessed with sex?"

"Huh?" Twilight asks, brow furrowed.

"Cadance and Pinkie Pie are both like that. Way more than anybody else we know. And they're both pink. I'm wondering if it's just a pink thing."

"Flash, that's—!" Twilight stops abruptly, a thoughtful look on her face. "Actually, you might be onto something there..."

I spend the rest of the day helping with housework and doing my laundry, while Twilight researches the connection between pink skin and aggressive sexuality. She doesn't reach any real conclusions on the issue...