Monday, November 30, 2015

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Today's Horoscope (Virgo): It usually isn't a good idea to meddle in things that don't concern you.

Early Morning

Thanksgiving break is over, and we're going back to school today.

Everybody still has vacation hangover. We all got in at different times yesterday...

Twilight and I were both too tired to talk to anybody last night, so I don't really know how everybody else's vacation went yet other than what they posted on Canterbook. We both want to talk to Fluttershy, and we definitely need to talk to Rainbow Dash...even if that's going to be a little awkward.

Twilight and I head out to walk Spike. "So...what's the plan?" I ask. "How're we gonna deal with Fluttershy?"

"I guess...just try to talk to her?" Twilight suggests. "After school would be best...you're not doing anything today, right?"

"Nope." I frown. "And after dinner, we should...talk to Rainbow Dash."

"I...don't know if that's a good idea," Twilight says. "I mean...yeah, I want to talk to her about, you know, all that...but...maybe it's a sensitive subject for her, and...and maybe she'll feel betrayed or embarrassed or something if we bring it up?"

I sigh. "Maybe, but...we can't just ignore this, pretend we don't know."

"Yeah..."

"Tell you what," I say. "I'll talk to her by myself first. Test the waters. How's that sound?"

Twilight frowns. "I still don't know if it's a good idea, but...okay."

After School

Twilight and I meet up at the school entrance, and hurry to make sure we're the first ones back to the dorm.

We wait in the lounge; after about twenty minutes, Fluttershy walks through the front doors, absorbed in her phone. She heads for the stairs; we stand and follow her.

As Fluttershy reaches the door to her room, Twilight rushes forward and touches her shoulder. "Fluttershy? Can we talk to you?"

Fluttershy spins around, eyes wide, and shrinks away from Twilight. "Wh-what?" She puts a hand to her chest. "Twilight...umm...can it wait? I...I...I have to brush Angel, and..."

"Fluttershy, please," Twilight says. "This'll just take a few minutes. We're just...worried about you."

Fluttershy frowns. "I'm fine," she says.

"No you're not," I say. "You haven't been fine since the Fall Formal."

Fluttershy cringes. "D-don't," she says.

Twilight takes hold of Fluttershy's upper arm and gently guides her to her room. Fluttershy makes a token effort to pull free, but slumps and allows herself to be pulled along. I follow close behind, placing myself right in the middle of the hall.

Spike looks up from his basket and barks happily. Fluttershy seems to soften slightly, as she squats down in the middle of the room and beckons to Spike, scratching behind his ears and tickling under his chin.

Twilight sits down on her bed; I close the door and lean against it.

"Did you have a good Thanksgiving?" Twilight asks pleasantly.

"Oh...umm...yes," Fluttershy says softly. "It was good. My parents were happy to see me...I was happy to see them...we had a wonderful dinner, just the three of us and my grandmother..." She blinks suddenly. "Oh! I'm sorry. I forgot to message everybody on Thanksgiving, didn't I? Is that why you're worried about me?"

"That's part of it," Twilight says. She looks at me.

"Ever since the Fall Formal, you haven't been..." I debate how to say this. "Well...to be honest, you're...always a little bit...you don't say much to anybody, and you don't really post to Canterbook very much either. We just...haven't really gotten to know you."

"But we know that you haven't been yourself since that night," Twilight says. "What happened? What made you run off and hide?"

Fluttershy sighs. "It's...it's nothing, alright? I was just being a crybaby and...and somebody said something that wasn't really nice but wasn't really mean either, and I just...I just took it the wrong way and ran off crying. I..." She sighs. "You don't need to worry about me."

"No...it's more than that," Twilight says. "You've really been acting strange since that night. And this whole thing with Rainbow Dash...you've sort of been treating her like..." She takes a deep breath. "Like shit."

Fluttershy's eyes harden; her hair falls over her right eye. "I'll never forgive Rainbow Dash for what she did to me," she hisses.

"Fluttershy, she was worried about you," I say, throwing my hands up. "She thought somebody tried to rape you!"

"Oh, so what, that gives her the right to...to put her hands all over me like that?" Fluttershy snaps, glaring up at me. There's genuine hatred in her eyes...

"She made a mistake, Fluttershy!" Twilight says. "But she did it because she was worried about you! She thought...she thought somebody had done something horrible to you, and..." She shrugs helplessly. "If...if they had, she probably woulda...I dunno..."

"Remember when Rainbow was hurt by those assholes?" I ask. "Remember how you helped her? You took really good care of her. She told me herself she never would've made it through that without you." I squat down and look Fluttershy in the eye. "She was scared shitless that somebody had...had really hurt you. You know how Rainbow is. She doesn't know what tact is. If you'd been...if you'd been raped, she'd have made it her entire mission in life to punish whoever did it." I sigh. "She feels awful about the way she upset you, but...you're just hurting her more by..." I look at Twilight.

"You not even coming to her birthday party really hurt her," she says. "Don't say you couldn't help it. You could've left Sunday instead of on her birthday."

Fluttershy doesn't look either of us in the eye.

"Look...we're her friends, and we thought you thought of us as friends too," I say. "But...this thing with you hurting Rainbow and...and hating her like this? When she's just worried about you? It's not cool."

"I'll talk to her, alright?" Fluttershy says softly. "I'll...I'll talk to her. If I think she's really sorry for what she did, then...we'll see." She stands up. "I'm going to my room now."

I look to Twilight, who sighs. I step out of the way and let Fluttershy past. Once she's gone, I sit down beside Twilight. "That went well," I mutter.

Twilight shakes her head. "I don't understand her at all..."

I put an arm around Twilight and pull her close. We sit like that for a little while before I remember I should probably do my homework and head for my own room to study.

The hatred in Fluttershy's eyes...

I've never seen a hateful glare like that before. It felt like she was trying to cut me down with just her eyes...

I finish my homework and head down to dinner. I've still got one more uncomfortable conversation to have today...

Evening

At dinner, Vice-Principal Luna asks, "So, did everybody have a good Thanksgiving?"

"Heck yeah!" Rainbow laughs. "Applejack's family is awesome! All that food..." She pats her stomach. "Good thing AJ made me do so much crap around the farm, I coulda put on five, maybe ten pounds!"

Applejack chuckles. "We enjoyed havin' ya, RD," she says.

"We had a good time," Twilight says, reaching over and squeezing my hand.

Luna raises an eyebrow. "Flash, you spent Thanksgiving with Twilight Sparkle's family?"

"Yeah," I say. "Her mom and Cadance are amazing cooks." I grin. "Hey, that reminds me...we've gotta have that green bean casserole here at the dorm sometime."

"You mean that stuff with mushroom soup and onions?" Rainbow asks. "Yeah, that stuff's not bad."

"You should've tried Mrs. Velvet's recipe," I say.

"Really now?" Applejack takes an interest. "Twilight, mind gettin' yer mom t' e-mail me that there recipe?"

"Sure," Twilight says.

"I wish my mother could cook," Rarity says. "Once again, we purchased our entire Thanksgiving repast pre-made. I, of course, had to oversee the heating up of packaged, prepared food...really, I'm the only one in my entire family who can be trusted anywhere near a kitchen appliance other than the refrigerator." She blinks. "Oh, but I did enjoy spending time with my parents and my dear little sister," she adds.

"Hey Fluttershy, how was your Thanksgiving?" Rainbow asks.

Fluttershy gives her a cold look...then shrugs indifferently. "It was nice," she says.

"Well mine sucked," Pinkie says huffily. "I mean the food...wasn't terrible, and I loved spending time with my sister Maud, but..."

Twilight looks at Pinkie with sad eyes. "Problems with your parents?"

"And my younger sisters," Pinkie says. "But mostly my parents, yeah. It's just..." She looks around the table helplessly. "It's not that they say anything—much—it's just that every time they look at me, it's...they just go out of their way to show me how much they disapprove of everything about me, you know?" She slouches down in her seat. "I hate going home..."

The rest of dinner is rather silent and uncomfortable after that.

After dinner, Twilight goes upstairs with Pinkie to try to take her mind off her family, while I pull Rainbow aside. "Hey, wanna practice guitar together?"

She nods. "Sure."

"Come up to my room."

I head to my room and set up my guitar, tuning it while I wait for Rainbow Dash. When she arrives, carrying the old acoustic, she sits down in my desk chair and tunes hers. I start playing a song I've liked for a long time. Rainbow taps on her guitar's body, nodding her head.

"So, Rainbow Dash," I say. "I remember you telling me I remind you of your dad."

Rainbow blushes furiously. "Uhh...y-yeah," she says. "Sorry about that. I was bein' lame."

"No, it's cool," I say. I take a deep breath. "Rainbow...I found out something the other day."

"What?" She leans forward. "About Zodiac? About...about Sunset Shimmer?"

"No, none of that," I say. "Umm...I don't know how to say this..."

"What?"

I stop playing and look Rainbow in the eyes. "Twilight's mom and dad knew your mom and dad in college," I say. "It...it came up when we were talking about something else entirely..." I swallow. "Twilight, Cadance, and I all know about...about your mom."

Rainbow looks down, clenching a fist. "Shit," she says.

"I'm sorry..."

"Don't," she says. "I don't care about...about that." She looks up. "How'd that even come up?"

I grimace. "Twi's mom was bitching about my parents," I say. "Then her dad dropped the name Firefly, and Mrs. Velvet went off on this rant about the whole thing. We...we didn't know it was about you until she mentioned...your name." I shrug. "So yeah...Twi's parents knew yours in college, and..." I wave my hands helplessly. "So...yeah."

Rainbow laughs ruefully. "My dad's awesome," she says. "He's...he's always had time for me, y'know? Except when he couldn't be around. And even then, he...he always makes sure I've got everything I need. He calls, he sends e-mails...he's involved in my life. I talk to him every day unless he just can't." She sniffles. "He taught me to play soccer. We...we have the same hair and everything.

"I was six before I even bothered wondering why I don't have a mom," Rainbow says. "I asked, and...and Dad said she just wasn't around, but...maybe I'd meet her one day." She chuckles. "He never said 'you don't have a mom' or anything, just 'maybe you'll meet her one day'.

"Then, about two years ago...he told me the truth. Figured I was old enough to know." Rainbow sighs. "I was so mad...I cried myself to sleep. Me! Cryin' myself to sleep like a dweeb. Fuck..." Tears well up in her eyes. "Dad said...he said I'm...a lot like my mom..." She looks up at me. "He said I'm a lot like some bitch that just squirted me out and ran off! I know he didn't mean to hurt me with that shit, but...it fuckin' hurt, you know? Like, what, I'm supposed to LIKE that I remind him of...of..." She drops her guitar and buries her face in her hands.

I set aside my guitar, get up, and walk over to her. I kneel down and pull her into a hug. "It's okay," I say. "I'm sorry..."

"What the hell?" Rainbow screams. "Why did she..." She pushes me away. "Dad said he wanted to make a life with her! And she just..."

I wrap my arms around her again and pull her close, patting her back. "Let it out," I say. "It's okay."

"Fuck you," Rainbow sobs. "Fuck you..."

I just hold her while she cries.

After several minutes, she sniffles, wipes her eyes, and says, "Thank you..."

She pushes herself to her feet and picks up her guitar. "I gotta...I gotta go," she says. "I...later."

I sit staring at the door for some time after Rainbow leaves, then put my guitar away and get ready for bed. Today's been exhausting, physically and mentally...