The Velvet Room...

The familiar scenery forms around us, a gold-framed door depicting the Hermit Arcana card standing serenely in the distance.

"So, we're still doin' this?" Rainbow asks.

"Looks that way," Applejack says.

"What...what is this?" a familiar voice that doesn't belong to anyone from the dorm asks.

We all turn around slowly.

Suri Polomare is standing in the middle of the Velvet Room, staring around at all of us in irritation.

"The hell?" Rainbow wonders.

Suri frowns. "Okay, what did you losers do to me? Where the hell are we?"

We look at each other in confusion.

"Flash? What's Suri doing here?" Pinkie asks.

"Is...is she the Shadow?" Twilight wonders.

I shake my head. "No," I say, looking from Suri to the Hermit door. "The Shadow is Coco Pommel this time."

"What are you freaks talking about?" Suri asks, stamping a foot. "I'm done with Canterlame! I don't know why you all did...whatever you did to me and brought me wherever this is, but you'd just better take me home right now so I can get you all put in jail!"

"Wow, she makes it sound so tempting," Rainbow quips.

"Wait, Coco's the Shadow?" Pinkie asks. She glances at the Hermit door, then back at Suri. "Oh no. This...this is bad, isn't it?"

I sigh. "Probably, yeah."

"Anyone wanna explain whut that prissy girl who won't stop screamin' is doin' here?" Applejack demands.

Zecora appears from the mists.

"The Hermit still has a bone to pick with this girl who behaves like a royal dick."

Rainbow snorts and snickers. Pinkie giggles.

Suri glares at Zecora. "Okay, who's this zigg—"

Fluttershy's staff upside her head silences her, staggering her forward.

"Oops," Fluttershy says, leaning idly on her staff. "My hand slipped." Rainbow hi-fives her.

"I didn't know you could bring people here who don't have Personas," I say to Zecora.

Zecora shrugs. "I did not summon this racist cunt. Your friend the Hermit is to blame for this stunt."

"Wow, you're in a bad mood tonight," Pinkie observes. "You're not usually this...sweary."

"I lost all my money on an all-in bet in a game of poker with Margaret," Zecora says sourly. "I had a full house, I should be rich, but I always lose to that cheating bi—"

"Why don't we open the Shadow door?" Twilight suggests with an overly large grin.

Zecora snorts and waves a hand vaguely at the door, then retreats to a safe distance.

I step forward and open the door while Suri starts complaining again. A cool blue light shines from within; Coco Pommel steps out, wearing her tennis uniform.

"YOU!" Suri screeches. "I should've known you had something to do with this, you mewling little twat!"

Oh, just shut the fuck up, Suri.

Coco looks up with gold on black eyes, a twisted sneer on her normally placid, adorably meek face.

You know, I probably wouldn't have needed so much help with my self-esteem and confidence if you hadn't been riding my ass since we were kids. Always bossing me around and acting like you were better than me! It's because you knew I was better than you and you were afraid I'd get picked over you, wasn't it? WASN'T IT!

"Oh, get OVER yourself," Suri snorts. "You're way too much of a pussy to ever be noticed by anyone, mmkay? I get ahead in this world because I know how to play the game. I know how to manipulate people like you. I know how to do whatever it takes to make sure I always come out on top. A weak little freak like you? How far do you really think you'll go in life? You're nobody, and you always will be."

You're wrong. I am NOT a nobody! I matter! I matter more than a stuck-up BITCH like you!

"That's right!" Pinkie says. "Coco has friends! People who care about her and support her and want her to succeed! What do you have?"

Suri smiles silkily. "Prestige. Power. Influence. Contacts who can ruin Coco's entire family, hmhm, mmkay?"

It takes a second for that to sink in.

"Oh no," Twilight moans. "You didn't..."

"Things aren't so rosey in the Pommel house right now," Suri says proudly, fanning herself with a hand. She flashes Coco a predatory smirk. "Are they?"

Burning black flames surround Coco as a shadowy tennis racket appears in her hand. With a blinding serve, she slams a ball of pure shadow into Suri's chest, knocking her flat on her ass.

Your pitiful little attempts to screw with me won't work! And I'm through putting up with your bullshit! I am the Shadow, the True Self! I hope your sick little stunt was worth dying for, because I'm about to shut your evil mouth for good!

Coco's Shadow burns with purple-black flames and grows upward, transforming into an elegant black-skinned angel with broad, feathery black wings, wearing a blood red tennis dress with white trim, as well as white tennis shoes and socks, all with red trim. Coco's bobbed seafoam hair tops a head with three glowing green tennis ball "eyes" for a face. The Shadow holds a massive, twisted red tennis racket with black barbed wire strings.

A tiny, superdeformed version of Coco pops up out of the Shadow's hair with a 'Hup!', flailing around stubby arms which hold two tiny tennis rackets in balled fists. The tiny Coco has an absurdly cheerful expression on her face.

Finally, two enormous pink tennis ball launchers, each with three heart-shaped barrels, appear to either side of Coco's Shadow.

"Suri, get behind me and stay put," Cadance instructs.

Suri apparently didn't notice her there before, because she looks surprised. "Nurse Cadance? Wow, you really let yourself go after I left."

"I'm pregnant, you snippy little bitch!" Cadance replies heatedly. "Now get your obnoxious ass over here so I can keep you safe!"

Oh, she's not going anywhere.

The ground underneath us changes into a tennis court with blood red asphalt. Four tall tennis nets made from sticky-looking, wickedly barbed black ropes rise up out of the asphalt, surrounding Suri. The nets are just tall enough that she can see over them, but impossible for her to climb out of without cutting herself to pieces. As if to make sure she stays put, the ground splits open around the tennis net cage, filling with bubbling green acid that emits putrid fumes into the air.

Suri shrinks away from the nets, her eyes wide and terrified. "Wh-what—?!"

"Damn!" Cadance says. "PERSONA!"

Eros forms, shedding cool light over the bloody asphalt. Suri gasps as she looks up at the massive, gleaming crystal heart.

"Get ready, everyone!" I say, already accessing Black Butterfly and equipping my axe. All around me, the others gear up as well.

"You're having a bad dream, Suri," Sonata says before turning her attention to the Shadow. "None of this is real. Think of it like that story about the stingy old man and the three ghosts. When you wake up tomorrow, try not to be such a total bitch, okay?"

The Shadow readies her racket and produces a flaming tennis ball which she bounces on the ground twice.

So, you're all ready for a match, huh? Which one of you gets to return my killer serve?

//Here she comes!//

Comet Ace

Coco lobs the flaming ball into the air and slams it hard and fast straight at Suri. She screams as it hits her, setting her on fire.

"Oh my God!" Pinkie cries.

"Whoa," Rainbow says, eyes wide.

Suri rolls around on the ground, screaming and trying to put herself out.

Striker Ace

Before any of us can move to help her, Coco nails Rarity in the side with a tennis ball made entirely of lightning. Rarity cries out as she drops to one knee, twitching and jerking as electricity snaps all over her body.

//Rarity is paralyzed!//

"Don't...worry about me," Rarity hisses. "Just...I'll be fine..."

"Okay, let's see you pull that crap again!" Rainbow yells. "PERSONA!"

Masukukaja

Nike soars high into the air, shedding a wave of light that makes everyone blur around the edges.

Fluttershy readies her phone and starts to call out, then stops. "What the fu—err, heck?"

"Fluttershy?" Twilight asks. "Are you okay?"

"I...I'm not sure," Fluttershy says, her eyes wide as she cradles her phone in her hands, her staff tucked under one arm. "Something's...something's different."

I'm pretty sure I know what that is...

Her expression becomes one of dawning wonder as she caresses her phone with a single finger.

"Artemis."

Fluttershy's Persona appears above her, a shell of holographic screens spinning away from her body, becoming a slowly rotating sphere of scrolling, flickering, flashing information. Her fingers dance across floating holographic keyboards, and one side of the shell opens; a storm of light blossoms into what I can only think of as the kind of ridiculously overcomplicated glowing magical bow you'd see in a magical girl anime, complete with a massive, improbable arrow of light ready to fire. Beneath Artemis, an arsenal of glowing arrows orbits a pillar of light extruding from the base of the screen shell.

Starlight Breaker

The arrows are all rapidly pulled up into the sphere and loaded into the bow as it launches one after the other at the enemy, inundating them with exploding magical arrows. When Artemis exhausts all her arrows, she fades away.

"Whoa," Rainbow says, her jaw practically scraping the ground. "That...that was awesome."

"Hooray!" Pinkie cheers, clapping her hands. "Fluttershy finally levelled up!"

"Now we've ALL evolved!" Sonata says, giggling.

Twilight purses her lips. "That means you've got another new Persona too, right Flash?" she asks. Fluttershy shoots me a curious look.

"Yeah," I say, already sliding the Priestess Arcana onto my phone. "KIKYO!"

A long-haired Neighponese priestess glides into view, surrounded by coiling, twisting white serpents that encircle her in a sinuous dance.

Samsara

At her silent command, the serpents shoot forward, plowing through the Shadows; one of them emerges from one of the ball launchers carrying a squirming black orb in its mouth. It crushes the orb in its jaws, and the ball launcher dissolves into a pile of black ash. The eels return to their mistress, and she fades serenely away.

"Really?" Rainbow Dash asks. "Fluttershy gets that awesome new sci-fi magical girl thingie, and all you get is some anime chick and a couple of snakes? Laaaame!"

"Rainbow Dash!" Fluttershy chides. "Be nice! Honestly, he's already pulled out so many big, destructive monsters, there can't be much more left in there! It's okay if he's down to the leftovers."

"Ouch, Fluttershy. Just...ouch."

"Well, I guess I'd better step up!" Pinkie says, summoning her blue jewel.

"ELEMENT OF LAUGHTER!"

Laughter fills the Velvet Room. A cool blue light surrounds us, even as waves of debilitating force press down on the Shadows.

"My turn! PERSONA!"

Tidal Wave

Leviathan appears, and a rising wave of ethereal water crashes down on the Shadows. Coco's tennis ball eyes turn violently red and she starts swaying more aggressively; the little Coco on top of her head drums her tiny fists on her head and makes a frustrated sound.

Rarity struggles to rise to her feet, but twitches, her phone clattering to the court as it slips from her nerveless fingers. "I think...I'm a bit...rattled still," she says apologetically.

"We'll take care of you as soon as we can," Twilight promises.

The tiny Coco makes a pouty noise and pulls a glowing white tennis ball out of the bigger Shadow's hair, then lobs it at the pile of ash that used to be one of the ball launchers.

Samarecarm

In a bright green flash, the ball launcher reappears, good as new.

"Oh great," Rainbow mutters. "It's one of those."

"Ugh! I hate it when they do this!" Sonata complains.

While the reconstituted ball launcher is still calibrating its barrels, the other one fires dozens of tennis balls at us.

Rapid Ball

Everyone gets hit except Applejack; a barrier reflects any shots aimed at her back at the Shadow, wobbling it. It hurts, but not terribly; still, Rarity looks woozy and Suri is badly burned and bruised in her little cage.

//Uhh...guys?// Cadance says, trepidation in her voice. //I've got some bad news.//

"What's wrong, Cadance?" Twilight asks.

//If Suri dies here, there's nothing we can do to save her. She'll die for real.//

Some of the girls gasp.

"But...but we can bring her back, right?" Fluttershy asks. "Most of us have died at least a couple of times—"

//That's different,// Cadance says. //I can't explain how, but...just trust me. You can't let Suri die. At all.//

"Got it," Twilight says, already tapping her phone. "PERSONA!"

Mediarahan

Athena Logia's healing light washes over all of us. Suri sits up, rubbing her head and groaning, all traces of her injuries erased. "Wh-what...?" she asks shakily. She looks around and lets out a frustrated snort. "Ugh! This still?"

"Ah think we need some protection," Applejack announces. "PERSONA!"

Marakukaja

Gaia erupts from the ground, and a golden light washes over all of us, imbuing us with a defensive aura.

Strike Attack

Coco lets out an enraged yell and pounds two hard, fast tennis balls into me, then into Pinkie. I can feel most of my ribs shatter from the impact, and collapse to the ground in burning agony. Across the way, I see Pinkie take a knee, hissing in pain. "Owie, right in the boobies," she moans.

"Okay, enough is enough," Rainbow says. "NIKE!"

Vorpal Blade

Nike soars high into the air, her guitar changing into a huge sword as she swoops down, slashing vigorously at the Shadows.

"PERSONA!" Fluttershy summons Artemis again; half her screens flash with complicated medical scans of me and Pinkie.

Mediarahan

Soothing green healing light washes over us as her fingers dance across her keyboards, and the screens all blink green and wink out as Artemis fades away. I stand up, rubbing my side; Pinkie hops to her feet and gives a quick, distracting bounce.

"Yeah, I'm pissed now," I say. "PERSONA!"

Virus Wave

Kikyo appears again, extending both hands and forming a series of complicated hand seals. Her serpents open their mouths and breathe jets of poisonous purple flames at the Shadows. The flames coil around Coco and both ball launchers and linger as Kikyo fades away.

"Here, Rarity, let me help you," Pinkie says. "EUPHORIA!"

Amrita

Euphoria appears above Rarity's head and spins in place, pouring rainbow liquid over her. Rarity's paralysis fades, and she picks up her phone, gingerly rising to her feet. "Thank you, darling," Rarity says, tossing her hair primly.

"Time to wave goodbye to this worst tennis princess! PERSONA!"

Tidal Wave

A massive tidal wave once again crashes over the Shadows as everyone except Pinkie groans at Sonata's bad pun.

"Revenge is a dish best served cold! WADJET-BAST!"

Mabufudyne

Wadjet-Bast appears, blowing the Shadows a frozen kiss which encases them all in frost. She snaps her fingers, and the frost explodes away with a sharp crack.

"Ugh, really?" Rainbow cries. "You too, Rarity?"

"Seriously, what's with the sudden hurricane of puns?" Twilight wonders.

The tiny Coco pouts adorably and starts waving her tennis rackets around.

Mediarama

Green light washes over the Shadows.

//The little one can heal them and bring them back to life, looks like,// Cadance reports.

"Wonderful," I mutter. "Anyone up for a little chibicide?"

"I'm always up for a little chibicide!" Sonata cries gleefully, a manic, creepy grin on her face.

Fast Ball

One of the ball launchers suddenly shoots a blazingly fast ball at Suri, beaning her in the head and knocking her against the net behind her. Before we can react, it fires another shot at Fluttershy which catches her in the gut and staggers her.

Rapid Ball

The other launcher fires an entire volley of shots at us, but incredibly, not a single one hits.

"PERSONA!"

Diarahan

Athena appears once more, healing Suri, who stands up and crosses her arms, glaring out at us.

"Leave me out of your weird fantasy tennis death game!" she snaps.

"Wish we could!" Rainbow calls back. "Really wish we could."

Applejack plants her feet and slaps her phone's screen. "GAIA!"

Gaia's Wrath

Gaia erupts from the ground again; the asphalt underneath the Shadows explodes, spraying plumes of magma intermixed with pillars of ice and stabbing bolts of lightning into the air.

Strike Attack

Coco roars and fires off two killer serves at Applejack, but they both rebound and hit her in the chest. Undaunted, she goes after Twilight, driving her to the ground with two more hard, fast serves.

"TWILIGHT!" I yell, rushing over to check on her.

"I'm okay," Twilight assures me. "Just...give me a second..."

"It's my serve now!" Rainbow announces. "PERSONA!"

Sonic Rainboom

Nike glides down and does a knee-slide, jamming on her guitar. A prismatic shockwave rips through the Shadows.

"Give us some protection!" I call to Fluttershy.

"Right!" she replies. "PERSONA!"

Tetrakarn

Artemis appears again; her holographic screens explode outward to surround us, becoming reflective barriers which flare brightly before fading from view along with their mistress.

I help Twilight to her feet. "How badly is everybody hurt?" I ask.

"Not...too badly," Twilight grunts.

"I'll worry about healing!" Rarity says. "You just worry about taking these Shadows out!"

I frown, looking Twilight over. "Maybe I can do both," I say. Serenity has an ability I don't think I've ever used...

I slide the Lovers onto my phone. "PERSONA!"

Serenity appears, a gleaming scepter in her hand. She traces a crescent arc in the air with it before pointing it at the Shadows.

Healing Escalation

A brilliant silver crescent flashes forward, cleaving through the Shadows like a blade before boomeranging back at our group. As it passes through us, it heals most of our wounds, though Twilight still looks pretty ragged. She's not the only one, though; one of the ball launchers is smoking and sparking.

"PERSONA!" Pinkie calls.

Matarukaja

A golden light seeps into each of us, and I feel great strength flood my body.

Sonata unlimbers her crossbow and points it at the smoking, sparking ball launcher. With a grim smile, she fires a bolt.

Pierce Attack

The launcher explodes, raining ash all over the court.

"Nice shot!" Rainbow cheers.

"Here, Twilight," Rarity says. "PERSONA!"

Diarahan

Wadjet-Bast's bolt of cloth wraps around Twilight, healing the rest of her wounds and leaving her looking refreshed and ready.

Mediarama

The little Coco starts flailing around and wailing at the top of her lungs. Then, she waves her rackets like semaphor flags, and green healing light seeps into the remaining Shadows.

High Ball

The other ball launcher lobs a high, slow ball toward Fluttershy. Her barrier appears, but the ball passes over it and hits Fluttershy square in the chest. Unprepared, she drops to her butt in surprise.

"Alright, I'm tired of this match," Twilight says. "ATHENA LOGIA!"

Maziodyne

Athena appears, raining a storm of lightning bolts on the remaining Shadows.

"If'n we put th' big one outta commission, we ain't gotta worry about th' squirt!" Applejack says. "PERSONA!"

God's Hand

Gaia appears and drives a massive fist into Coco's torso, staggering her.

I can't help but notice that we've all lost our blur, as usually happens around this point in the battle. In a battle like this, where the Shadows have pretty good aim, that's not necessarily a good thing...

Coco's tennis ball eyes change from angry green back to glowing neon green, and she suddenly pulls out a tennis ball that isn't a "ball" at all, but a naked Coco Pommel, curled into the fetal position, surrounded by a glowing pink heart. With an overly dramatic backswing that flashes her white panties at all of us, the Shadow serves the naked Coco ball straight at me.

Fanservice Ace

I can only stare in numb shock as the Coco ball unfolds and collides head-first with me...

Suddenly, I realize that I'm playing for the wrong team. I should be helping my captain win! I mean, this is a Canterlot tennis match, right?

Comet Ace

Coco drives a flaming ball at Pinkie. Pinkie catches fire and starts dancing around, yelping and shrieking as she tries to extinguish herself. The flames keep burning. It's pretty funny. I think. Dimly, I'm aware I should be really upset about this...

Masukukaja

Rainbow Dash does something, and her entire team starts to blur.

Magarudyne

Fluttershy does something, and gale force winds buffet Coco and the ball launcher. Coco's looking pretty worn out and is hurting bad. I have to do something...!

"PERSONA!"

Serenity appears, giving me a worried, dubious frown as she glances at the girls lined up against Coco. She then sighs, turns to my captain, and spreads her wings wide. Her crystal shines...

//"Flash?! What are you doing?!"//

Salvation

Dazzling silver light washes over my captain, her little head friend, and the ball launcher, making them all good as new.

"Dude, what the fuck?"

"Flash, are you high?!"

"Honestly! What is WRONG with you?"

//It's not his fault! The Shadow's messing with his mind! He thinks you're the enemy now!//

"Nobody messes with my Flashie's mind!" Pinkie yells. She rushes up to Coco and snaps a whip at her; Coco smashes her with her racket and sends her flying back to her team.

Sonata does something, and a big wave hits my team. Then Rarity does something that doesn't seem to do anything.

Coco's little head pet friend brings the other ball launcher back to life. The one that was still standing fires a bunch of balls at the other team, but somehow they all wind up bouncing back and hitting it. It looks pretty badly damaged by the rebound...

Twilight does something, and lightning hits the captain and her head pet and her ball launchers. The damaged one explodes, leaving behind a pile of ash.

"Flash, snap out of it!" Twilight pleads. Why does she look so upset? This is just a tennis match, right...? So what if we have to play against each other?

"Goddammit all!" Applejack snarls. The ground under my team explodes; lava and stuff hurts Coco and wrecks the ball launcher we still have, but it looks like it can still shoot. Good.

Get ready to see my secret weapon!

Oooh, the captain has a new serve! I can't wait to see it.

Angel Ace

Coco pulls out two glowing white balls. She serves one of them at Fluttershy, who withstands the hit without batting an eye. She serves the other at Twilight, who crumples bonelessly to the ground.

(Idiot! Wake up! That's your girlfriend and she's dead!)

"FUCK!" Rainbow snarls. She makes that powerful wind again. What the heck has she been eating?

Fluttershy does something, and Twilight stands back up. Some part of me is profoundly relieved. Another, smaller part of me feels like I should be furious. But mostly, I just want to help Coco win this match...

We win if I kill Suri, right? I grip my racket—or is it an axe? It looks more like an axe than a racket—and jump over the net, smashing it over her head.

//Oh my god! Flash, wake up! Get hold of yourself! You can't do this!//

Why not? Suri deserves to die, right?

"LET GO OF HIM, YOU BIG MEANIE!" Pinkie yells, flailing her whip at Coco again.

"SIREN SONG!"

Ethereal singing echoes from the distant mists, haunting in its beauty. Coco's team burns with a faint, hazy red aura; a thin ribbon of light greenish-blue smoke wafts away from her, trailing into Sonata's choker.

Rarity does something, and all the damage I did to Suri goes away. Coco's head pet friend waves her rackets around, and the team starts to look a little less banged up. The ball launcher that's still working is burning red with anger, and fires two angry red balls at Rarity, knocking her flat on her marshmallow ass. Heh.

"ELEMENT OF HONESTY!"

A pale orange glow surrounds Applejack, overlaid by a ghostly image of a giant, ripe apple. The ghostly apple shrinks in on itself, fading into Applejack's skin. A similar orange glow surrounds me, and...

Wait...what was I doing again?

I shake my head and look around at my friends. Rarity's on the ground, groaning in pain. Everyone looks a little pissed at me. "What...what happened?"

Twilight folds her arms. "Back with us, are you?"

//Twilight, it's not his fault,// Cadance says gently. //This isn't the first time we've seen a Shadow that could mess with our minds, remember?//

"She's right," Fluttershy says. "We need to be careful here. She can turn us against each other, make us heal her, make us kill that twat over there for her..."

"You mean I was mind-controlled?" I ask, feeling sick. "Oh god..."

"We're just glad to have you back," Pinkie says, rushing up to me and hugging me. "Come on, let's get this crazy homicidal version of our friend."

I nod, clenching my jaw. "Yeah."

//Hey, guys? Something funny's going on. That little anime-looking thing on the Shadow's head...its defense keeps changing. Give me a minute to figure it out.//

Service Ace

Suddenly, a blindingly fast serve from Coco slams into Rarity, who's still on the ground. Rarity lets out a strangled scream which trails off into a gurgling death rattle.

Striker Ace

Before any of us can register her death, an electrified ball hits Rainbow, staggering her.

"Oh hell no you did NOT," Rainbow snarls. "PERSONA!"

Vorpal Blade

Nike flies at the Shadows, her guitar-sword gleaming as it cleaves and dices.

"ARTEMIS!" Artemis appears, typing frantically as flashing red screens light up around her.

Samarecarm

A green light pulses over Rarity, who takes a deep breath; the red screens slow down and turn green, beeping softly. Artemis fades away as Rarity stands up.

"Okay, let's try that again," I say. "Can you girls cover me while I get it ready?"

"Can do!" Pinkie says.

"Ooh, you're gonna use him again?" Sonata asks in a breathy, dreamy tone.

By way of answering, I slide the Fortune Arcana onto my phone...

"SEPHIROTH!"

Once again, Sephiroth descends from above, his one black wing spread wide, becoming ethereal as his form envelops me. Ghostly images of stars and planets begin swooping past in a slow, grandiose panorama.

Sonata sighs. "I so wanna have sex with that Persona..."

"How about if Flash cosplays him for you?" Pinkie asks.

"Mmm...nah, wouldn't be the same."

"Oh well, still a good idea," Pinkie says. "PERSONA!"

Orgy of Death

Euphoria appears, dancing her way through the Shadows and dishing out sexy damage. Speaking of Personas you'd wanna have sex with...

"LEVIATHAN!"

Tidal Wave

Another tidal wave crashes over the enemy.

Samarecarm

The little head-Coco brings the destroyed ball launcher back to life.

Fast Ball

The other ball launcher takes a shot at me; it slips past the girls' defenses and sends me flying. With a whir and a clunk, it readies another shot and nails Suri in the face, dropping her like a sack of fertilizer.

"PERSONA!"

Mediarahan

Twilight hastily summons Athena, who heals everyone. Somehow, through all this, I've managed to hold my concentration on building up Sephiroth's power...

"GAIA!"

Gaia's Wrath

The ground underneath the Shadows explodes again, unleashing the hellish fury of nature.

//I've figured it out! Whenever the anime-doll thing heals or brings back its allies, its defense drops sharply! It takes a little time for its defense to go back to normal! That's when you need to focus everything on the doll on her head!//

"That way we don't have to deal with her healing or bringing them back to life anymore!" Fluttershy says. "Good plan! Let's do that!"

Fanservice Ace

Coco pulls out another pink-heart naked Coco ball and serves it at Rarity. Rarity staggers as the naked Coco slams into her, then shakes her head and flutters her eyelashes. "Oh my," she says, looking dreamily up at Coco. "I...I do believe I've fallen in love, darling!"

"Oh man, not this again!" Rainbow moans as Coco pulls out another naked Coco ball, which she serves at Fluttershy.

Fluttershy steps out of the way of the flying naked Coco tackle, an unimpressed look on her face. "Sorry, not gay, and if I was I'd go for girls with boobs at least as big as mine."

//Guys? You need to do something about Rarity before she heals the Shadows!//

"I'll take care of it!" Pinkie says. "Everybody else, just...just do as much damage as you can!"

"Good plan!" Rainbow agrees. "PERSONA!"

Magarudyne

Nike sends dozens of sharp blades of gale-force wind flying through the Shadows. The one remaining ball launcher is torn to shreds; its pieces turn to dust as they fall to the ground.

"PERSONA!"

Starlight Breaker

Once again, Artemis unloads a hailstorm of magical girl arrows at the Shadows.

"NOW! SEPHIROTH!"

Supernova

Sephiroth rises into the air as a spinning starfield spreads out away from me, becoming a glowing white circle that surrounds Coco. With a loud, ringing chime, a solid white column of light erupts from the circle, slamming into Coco and her chibi head pet. When the light fades, the glowing circle remains, pulsing with stellar energy. I sink to my knees, exhausted, as Sephiroth ascends and fades away.

"No offense, dude, but I think you should stick with the fire-breathing monster lizard and leave the pretty-boy that can't even kill anything at home next time," Rainbow says.

"Oh, hush," Pinkie says. "I think that glowing magic circle thingie is pretty sweet." She shakes her head. "Anyway, better deal with Rarity before she does something silly. PERSONA!"

Amrita

Euphoria appears, splashing rainbow liquid in Rarity's face with a playful flick of her toe. Rarity shakes her head and looks around, blinking. "Wh-what...?"

"Welcome back, ice princess," Rainbow says with a smirk. "I recorded your whole make-out session with that Shadow."

Rarity's face burns red. "Wh-what?!"

"She's kidding," Twilight says, shooting Rainbow a reproachful glare.

"PERSONA!"

Virus Wave

Leviathan rises up and summons a virulent purple tidal wave, which crashes over Coco; it doesn't do anything except get her hair and dress a little wet.

Rarity frowns at Rainbow, then shakes her head and turns her attention back to Coco and mini-Coco. "PERSONA!"

Mabufudyne

Wadjet-Bast envelops the Shadows in ice, which explodes with a sharp crack.

Mini-Coco waves her rackets around, and healing light washes over her and the big Coco. Twilight summons Athena, who rains lightning down on the Shadows. Applejack summons Gaia, who once again makes the ground explode and spray lava and stuff.

Man, these battles are getting repetitive...

Sephiroth's circle flares, engulfing the Shadows in a column of blinding light. As soon as it fades, Coco fires a deadly, blazing-fast serve at me, sending me flying. I nearly wind up in the acid moat around Suri's cage...

Comet Ace

Before I can get up, Coco nails me with a fireball. I scream in agony and roll around on the ground, careful to roll away from the acid as I smother the flames.

"FLASH!" Twilight screams.

Rainbow Dash summons Nike, who slashes at Coco and head-Coco with her guitar sword again.

Fluttershy glances worriedly at me, then summons Artemis.

Magarudyne

This time, when the hole in the screen opens, instead of a magical girl light bow, several spinning discs of wind appear, launching like buzzsaw blades at the Shadows.

Strike Attack

Still on fire, I charge up to Coco, swinging my axe at her knee with all my might. Coco kicks me across the court, and I skid painfully to a stop at Twilight's feet. The fire won't stop burning me...

Euphoria grapples with Coco while Sonata fires a crossbow bolt at mini-Coco. As Euphoria fades away, Wadjet-Bast's ice attack engulfs the Shadows again. Mini-Coco heals herself and bigger-Coco, and Twilight heals me.

The flames are still burning me, but the others don't seem to notice!

After another eruption courtesy of Applejack and Gaia, the white circle pulses again, shooting a column of light up into Coco and Mini-Coco.

Fanservice Ace

Coco produces two more naked Coco balls and lobs them at Pinkie and Rarity. Rarity swoons; Pinkie's eyes turn into little hearts.

//Guys, be careful! Pinkie and Rarity are both charmed, and something's wrong with Flash...I think he's having a panic attack!//

"Panic THIS!" Rainbow cries. "PERSONA!"

Sonic Rainboom

Nike's rainbow shockwave slams into Coco and head-Coco.

"ARTEMIS!"

Starlight Breaker

Artemis unloads her magical girl bow into the Shadows again.

Strike Attack

I'm still on fire. I run up to Coco and hack away at her leg for all I'm worth.

"That's not very nice," Pinkie says. I turn to face her; her eyes are cloudy and there's a creepy smile on her face. "You're all meanies and you should be punished. PERSONA!"

Euphoria appears, a strange expression on her face—mixed mortification and curiosity. With a tilt of her head and a shrug of her shoulders, she flips the urn she's standing on into the air with her toes and catches it, then points it at all of us like a cannon.

Mahamaon

Glowing white balls of confetti and fireworks explode from the urn, slamming into Rainbow, Applejack, and Sonata, who fall to the ground dead.

"Oh no," Twilight moans, her hands flying to her face and her eyes wide in horror.

"Shit!" Fluttershy snarls.

Rarity lets loose with a full-bodied noblewoman's laugh, the back of her hand pressed to her mouth. "Persona, darling!"

Wadjet-Bast appears, a haughty expression of arrogant scorn on her face.

Diarahan

Her bolt of fabric lashes out like an angry cat's tail, wrapping itself around the mini-Coco and completely healing her.

//Oh no! Rarity! What have you DONE?!// Cadance moans.

"It's not her fault," Twilight says with a worried frown. "She's under the Shadow's control."

//I know, but that just made this so much worse!//

"Well, on the bright side, at least she didn't heal the big one," Fluttershy points out.

Mini-Coco cheers happily and resurrects one of the ball launchers. Twilight snarls and lets loose with another round of lightning. As Athena Logia fades away, the white circle pulses one last time, engulfing the Shadows in searing white light, then disappears.

Angel Ace

Coco lobs two glowing white tennis balls at Twilight and Fluttershy. Nothing happens to either of them. Fluttershy summons Artemis, who resurrects Sonata.

The fire eating me alive has finally stopped burning, leaving me filled with a cold rage. Throwing my axe to the ground, I slam my hand down on the screen of my phone hard enough that I almost crack it. "PERSONA."

Sephiroth ascends from the ground, solidifying as he flies in a straight line at Coco, drawing his sword.

Hassou Tobi

His absurdly long blade flashes in eight diagonal cuts as he passes through Coco.

Coco screams and drops her racket, sinking to her knees as thick, gloppy red-black blood pours from her wounds. Her eyes stop glowing and roll back in her head. Chibi-Coco's face contorts into an expression of pure outrage, complete with cross-popping veins on her forehead as she shakes her little fists at us.

Pinkie and Rarity shake their heads and stumble. "Wh-what was I doing...?" Rarity mumbles.

"Whoa, what...what happened?" Pinkie asks. She looks at Coco, who's motionless and bleeding, her tennis ball eyes blank and lifeless. "Did...did we win?"

"I...I think so," Twilight says. She looks around, frowning at Rainbow and Applejack, who are still lying on the ground dead. She looks at Suri, who's still penned in by barbed nets and is watching all this with sick fascination. "Flash? Cadance?"

//I'm still...// Cadance shakes her head. //I don't know. Give me a second.//

"Well, while you're doing that..." Pinkie and Rarity bring Rainbow and Applejack back to life. They stand and stretch, then join the rest of us in staring at the dead Shadow.

"Uhh...don't these things usually turn back inta th' person they done come from?" Applejack asks, scratching her head.

"Yeah, they...they do," I say slowly.

//IT'S NOT OVER! KILL THE LITTLE ONE QUICK BEFORE—//

The chibi-Coco on the dead Shadow's head suddenly smirks like a naughty cat as she drops a shining white ball onto her host's hair...

Samarecarm

Shadow Coco's eyes roll back around to face us, glowing anew. She picks up her racket and slowly rises to her feet.

"FUCK!" Rainbow yells. "NO! BULLSHIT! WE KILLED IT!"

Rapid Ball

The ball launcher that's still working—barely—starts firing dozens of tennis balls. Caught completely off guard, we're all hit—except for Applejack, of course, whose barrier repels the balls that fly at her.

"Dammit!" Twilight yells in frustration. "PERSONA!"

Maziodyne

Athena Logia appears again, calling forth a lightning storm which destroys the remaining ball launcher and leaves chibi-Coco's hair standing on end.

"So why ain't this thing dead?" Applejack asks as she massages her shoulder and cracks her neck.

Cadance gasps. //I get it now! Guys, the chibi doll is the Shadow's real body! THAT'S what you have to kill!//

Sonata looks up brightly, understanding dawning in her eyes. "Oh, it's like Lavos! I should've figured that out..."

Rainbow groans. "Great, now she tells us..."

Fanservice Ace

A naked Coco ball flies at Rainbow, who easily dives out of the way.

Service Ace

This is followed by one of Coco's powerful serves, which hits Suri in the face again, driving her into the barbed nets. Rainbow counters with wind, while Fluttershy heals everyone.

"I'm sick of this," I mutter. "SEPHIROTH!"

Heaven's Blade

Sephiroth swoops down from behind Coco and raises his sword over his head, savagely impaling the chibi-Coco through her tiny torso. As he fades away, Euphoria flings herself ass-first at chibi-Coco, knocking the whole Shadow to the ground and grinding her ass in its face before delivering several sharp kicks all over both the big Shadow and chibi-Coco. Sonata takes aim with her crossbow and puts a bolt through the center of chibi-Coco's forehead as big-Coco sits up.

Lastly, Rarity summons Wadjet-Bast for one final, devastating ice attack. Chibi-Coco screams and flails as she freezes over, then explodes in grisly chunks of dead chibi.

The tennis court disappears, as does the cage of barbed nets. Coco's Shadow shrinks to normal size, her head bowed and her fists clenched at her sides.

Somehow, Suri found out...I'm illegitimate. She leaked it to the tabloids. The press has been hounding my dad about it ever since, and things haven't been too great at home either.

Pinkie gasps. "Oh my god," she says softly.

"Yikes," Rainbow says. "No wonder you're pissed."

Shining tears stream down Coco's face.

Why couldn't you just let me kill her?

I walk up to Coco and place a hand on her shoulder. "Because you'd never be able to live with yourself if you did," I say. "She's not worth it, Coco. You're strong. You and your family will endure whatever hell she's put you through. At the end, you'll still be the same amazing, talented person, and she'll still be the same miserable, spiteful cunt. Isn't it enough that you get to live with the knowledge that you're strong, talented, and confident, and all Suri has is her own bitchiness? You know she'll never have the most important thing you have. She'll never have friends."

"SCREW YOU! I have friends! I have tons of friends!" Suri yells.

We all turn to face her. "Really?" I ask quietly.

She looks at all of us, her face burning. Then, with a sigh, she bows her head and looks away.

Pinkie walks up to stand beside me. "See, Coco? The best way you can punish Suri for all the hell she's put you through is to let her go through life friendless, miserable, and alone."

Coco looks up at me, then at Pinkie. She smiles.

Yeah...I think I can live with that.

She fades away, leaving behind the Hermit card.

"So what do we do about this bitch?" Rainbow asks.

"What bitch?" Sonata replies. "She's gone."

"Good riddance," Fluttershy mutters. "You know she's had three secret abortions since she enrolled in CHS?"

"GAH! Fluttershy!"

"What? It's true..."

Zecora walks into view. "Well met, guests, and good night to you all. Rest well, for in two nights, Justice will call."

And the Velvet Room fades away into empty dreams...